Monday Mornin Blues

Last night, as I sipped not one but 11 bottles of Miller and a couple of pints o' da black stuff, the ramifications seemed not only worth it, but something to strive for. Me Mother woke my drunken self at 7:58 in the A.M to go to the Motherfuckin' Dentist. I went to that shit and all he done was tell me what I already know,'eh.....ye....that tooth is broken', he threw in a bill for $140(not dollars....Euro, theres no sign for yoyos on this lame-ass machinebox) and made some snide comment about me alcoholic breath(tic-tacs dint work). If that shit aint enough for a Monday morning, gotta bus straight from el dentistro and ended up here 45 minutes early and, having forgotten d'old student I.D hadda fork out another 2 squids ta get a pass for the library, day aint near over yet neither..................oh and little Aislin's still got the schnifflez.

Sound, I'm off t'Irish.

Congratulations Sugar Puff Monster

Local Sugar Puff Monster, Eric, racked up a massive ten comments/questions as he rattled an otherwise indifferent S.Ryan in Sociology this week. While remaining passive to the dickhead of a lecturers bullshit this reporter lent an ear to the barrage offered by the cuddly Tipperary man as he celebrated his Birthday in some style, with an intellectual invasion. Happy Birthday Sugar Puff Monster, Happy Birthday.

Whatever happened to hide and go seek?

Hide and go seek was such an integral part of so many kids lives growing up but a lack of initiative on everyone's part has allowed it to shrink away into a curious demise. Okay so you might say,'what's so curious about the demise, 'we ain't young no more' but surely the game could only get better now that we're older...........Taking the original, brilliant game and supplementing it with adult vices couldn't fail to grant it a new lease of life.'But how' I hear you ask. Take for instance alcohol, surely it would increase not only the importance of the game, but also the pace and urgency at which it is played. Not only would it contribute to a more physical approach(thus appealing to Australians) but the ensuing violence can't fail to maintain healthy television ratings.The introduction of gambling and in-game forfeits could also lead to specialised media coverage and and a wider audience, playing-base and market. The game would naturally evolve with the new added interest and proffesionally organisedgames, becoming bigger, bolder and faster. How many of us, given the choice, would have joined Hind and go seek teams at a young age instead of the norm?

Let's bring it back, let's throw guns, sex and cars into the mix and let's have a fucking great time!

Coming second in a race with a bus but pretending you weren't actually chasing it in the first place.

While gangster leaning at the back of the second floor of my comutitron3000(The old bus) this morning I perked up considerably, as did most of the bus crowd, when I saw a desperate flurry of arms and legs scrambling down the road in cold pursuit of a lost cause, the Bus. When they realised they weren't going no where on this bus they pretended they hadn't wanted to get the bus at all, in fact they were only joggin.....in their suit and tie with their briefcase. He slowed from red in the face puffing sprinter to carefree early-morning stroller in a transformation that singularly failed to fool any of us. He surprisingly didn't do a warmdown and/or stretch, I bet he regrets that now.

Me, Max and Nick; Pirates of the Carribean.

Sitting in the canteen yesterday the three of us; Me, Max and Nick formulated a plan to escape not only the rigours of daily college life but of Irish life in general. Having briefly considered the honourable thing, hara-kiri, plunging swords into our collective abdomens, instead we settled on the hijacking of Irish Ferries flag-ship, the Swift. After hours of research and carefully thought out tactics we decided the best way to steal would be to pose as would-be backpackers and bludgeon the captain on the back of the head with a giant wooden spoon. We would then produce our own captain, Ian(stolen from college) who would initially navigate until we reached levels of similar proficiency, he would then be murdered bloodily. Having acquired the ship and relied on Irelands lack of initiative to make our escape, we would set a course for the Carribean, thus completing the latter part of our name,'.....the Carribean'. Once there we would engage in wholesale piracy ending with our to be fabled demise amidst the brothels and booze of Georgia and the South Sandwich Islands. Anything to get outta college.